Plodding on my hands, I take a small radio. I do not even need your presence form anymore in such these moments. Moreover, I only do not want my life purposes and dedications to you become disturbed just because of classic songs with lower pop lyrics ala Robbie Mc Auley. I push the ‘off’ button and then put it back on the previous place, on the table.
I turn my bodies and arm position; again I come into sight over every span of her calm face, although a half of my consciousness is still left behind the song. It is felt peculiar if our routine habit between you and me tonight should be disturbed only by the lyrics. Switching off the radio is the right choice, isn’t it?
Radio ?! I cannot believe that this simple thing I bought from my saving is still looked young. A small radio which once became my most logical reason for me to be able to visit your town in that time, now it makes me smile alone. Maybe my smile now is not similar as my friends’ smile before, when I said I want to go to another town for delivering the radio. Imagine that you all, friends, I spontaneously chuckle till I have no opportunity thinking about your pillow (read: my chest) certainly jolting.
“Sssstt….,” I mumble in the fatigue.
I want to be together with you in the world where your beautiful eyes were hidden by yourself. I want at least you are there in my sight. Looking at you playing around is like you always told when I start to be “serious”.
While you are sleeping, allow me to give you a little presentation about games. You want me to explain funnily? Alright. I once was a little boy who ran to keep the kite eagerly or busily rolled a used motorcycle tire with a twig in my hand. Once I also ran to chase butterflies in the meadow or felt the earth was rotating and my stomach was quaking while on the swing.
What kind of games do you want to hear from me again? Arrghh….I really want to wake you up, so we can get into arguments. But what for? I am sure that later, one night, my brief explanation will reach your dreamland.
The sun shines like a light which break down the darkness of the age, in the same way honesty should be born from your disability in explaining the “games”. Slowly you wipe your eyes, see toward the table, and take your hand phone. Your morning and his morning are complete, aren’t they?
To my Lord who has power over there, I just ask for time, like a little boy who pulls the blanket in the morning, then request another five minutes to whoever wake him up. I am a blanket in her bedroom, which she usually wears to cover her face when she feels there is a ghost behind the window. I am the radio which keeps her hand phone! Five minutes only I want to sleep any longer! Five minutes only, let her keep playing in the dreamland, with ….. With a name which unconsciously she said last night.
Now, wash your face with fresh water. Good morning, you.
-Yogya, June 2011-
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